Posted on July 13 2016
Spiritual Age (How old do you feel?): Varies from day to day. Some days 80, some days 8.
Location: Los Angeles
Occupation: Owner of my own Health and Wellness Practice
How would you describe your personal style? Classic, but current. I love the simplicity of a crisp new white t-shirt against some jeans or khakis. I have collected vintage Pendleton’s for almost half my life and I have recently become quite fond of old 70’s polyester button ups. I think there is more to say with the little things - accessories, shoes, etc.; less is more. Clean shoes are a must and I don’t usually stray from the classics: Vans, Chucks, winos, or Cortez because they will never go out of style. Before kids, ironing was a must and creases were ALWAYS on point! Nowadays I’m lucky to leave the house with pants on.
What qualities and characteristics embody a Modern Father? Being involved. Sadly, the bar has been set so low for men and its time for us to step up as fathers and parent as a team with our partners. One of the most important qualities I have tried to embody as a modern father is to always keep it lighthearted and remember to have a sense of humor. Don’t rely on someone else to do something when you are present and capable of doing it yourself. Be responsible for your actions and when you are wrong, be man enough to promptly admit it. More than anything, a modern father should know that showing love and compassion for your children is not a sign of weakness. Being involved as a father does not make you less of a man.
How would you describe your parenting style? I go with my gut. I don’t know why but I have an amazing mothers instinct, lol! Overall, I try my best to be present, let them know how much I love them, and when I’m not being the best I can be in the moment, don’t hesitate to acknowledge my shortcomings.
How has becoming a father changed you? My whole life I had lived within my comfort zone, afraid of failure and embarrassment. Being a father, there is no time for fear and no room for ego. With my kids best interests involved, I don't have time to obsess with all the "what ifs" in day to day life. Having the confidence in knowing that I am a great father has translated over into all aspects of my own life.
Best/Worst parenting moment so far? Worst parenting moment: Don’t ever go to ikea with a week old newborn and a 2yo. After a legendary meltdown, we got in the car, skipping the ice cream cone we promised our son we would get him if he was good. When he asked my response was something like this, “NO, you can never have an ice cream ever again!! Even if you are 30 years old and I see you eating an ice cream I will smack it out of your hand…”. On the drive home he says “Papa, go home, play?…”, I took it as, hey pops, are we still cool??? Yeah, I wept like a little girl. Best parenting moment: Being home to witness my sons first steps. I had missed everything up until then, and I had this crazy feeling like he waited for me to get home from work to do it.
What are your hopes for your child(ren)? I want my children to be happy and feel secure. I want them to love life and to understand struggle, but to be empowered by it. I hope that they are good, confident gentlemen that give back to this world.
Favorite thing to do with your kids: Disneyland! Its a great way to kill time, and since we are self employed we can go during the week when it isn’t busy. I know its cliche, but there is something magical about the place! Even if we are only there for a couple hours, it feels like nothing outside those gates matters.
What empowers you as a father? Knowing that I have the opportunity to be the father I always wanted but never had. My ultimate contribution in life is raising good human beings.
What do you want your legacy to be? I want my children to know that I faced some difficult obstacles in life, but never used that as an excuse to fail, instead using it as motivation to keep pushing and do better each day. I hope they can look back and know that all I have gone through was for a purpose - to help and to be of service to others along the way. More than anything I want my boys to know that when I tell them they can do or be anything they want to be in life - they will believe and know it to be true.
What fears do you have pertaining to being a father? Growing up without a strong male role model, I feared having boys. I was never really a “man’s man” kind of guy so I worried I wouldn’t know what to do when the time came around for sports and things like that. I have come to realize that is the least of my worries!
Who is your role model? Not sure I found one yet...